{My Grandpa}

Last week Thursday, my mother called me at 10:30am to tell me my grandpa passed away. It was not a complete surprise: my Grandpa had been immobile since December and we recently learned his cancer was spreading, the doctor said he would not live beyond the summer. Yet, the news shocked me even though I thought I mentally prepared for this moment. It was one thing to process Grandpa was very, very sick and would only be with us for a little longer but it was completely different to process he passed because it was just so final.

My Grandpa’s wake brought more people than my parents, aunts & uncles, and Grandma could ever imagine. During his lifetime, my Grandpa was active in the local parish, volunteered at the food kitchen, ran a funeral home and coached at a local high school for 20 years. While my Grandpa described football as “just a hobby,” the sport was so much more than that. During his time at St. Joe’s, he was voted “Coach of the Year” several times and after he left the  Marauders, he joined their Hall of Fame. He also attended and set up football clinics in the Baltimore, Maryland area and traveled extensively to see as many college games as he could.

The weekend of his wake and funeral I was a professional crier. I used to tease my mother when she cried at the end of my Disney movies…and now I cry at the mere thought of Bambi. Can you say karma?? Through the tears and grief, it was wonderful to see family members from out-of-town, some of whom I haven’t seen in years.  I had a great time listening to my dad and his cousins share stories about the family. Several of the stories were really incredible and should be written down. Maybe a future project for me?

At the Mass, the church was positively packed and it was standing room only. The love in the room was incredible and the Mass was beautiful, there were 9 priests instead of only 1. Of course, I was teary-eyed but I pulled myself together to go to the lectern and say the Responsorial Psalm with my younger cousin. My father gave a beautiful eulogy for my Grandpa and a former football player of my grandpa’s also spoke to highlight Grandpa’s football career.  Following the burial, we held a funeral breakfast for our family and friends.

It had been a hectic, emotionally draining weekend and it was nice to just sit down and breathe. We ate, we chatted (Can you tell I come from a family of talkers??), and swapped stories of my grandpa. In the background, my uncle played a slideshow of pictures of my grandpa along with his many “Tuckerisms.” To share a few:

Tucker’s Creed: 

“Be Prepared for Sudden Change”

“Know Where Your Help Is”

“Make Your Own Sunshine”

These were his guideposts to life and he gave them freely to others, especially his players. When my Grandpa was sick, a former player wrote him how he started his own business and used Tucker’s Creed to direct his business! The letter meant a lot to my Grandpa and he showed it to me the  last time I visited him.

My Grandpa had a notorious sweet tooth (I guess it must be genetic) and loved his birthday more than a little kid. It was only fitting he passed away on the morning of his 82nd birthday and to commemorate his life, my aunt ordered “Birthday Cookies” for all of us.

Even though it was inherently a sad weekend, it was uplifting to know Grandpa is no longer in so much pain and is in a better place. The outpouring of love from the community was incredible and helped ease us through this time.

The day after the funeral, my mother and I visited the Chautauqua Institution for a spirit renewal…but I’m getting ahead of myself, that’s tomorrow’s post.

Rest in Peace, Grandpa. I love you and “keep doing what you’re doing.”