Warning: This is a heavier type of post than I usually share. It’s a bit of an update on my recent health issues + what’s on my mind as we head into 2022.
Image originally found in this post: How To Make Peonies Bloom Faster
Deep breath in, deep breath out. Okay, where do I start? If you follow me on Instagram, then you may remember this part. Toward the end of April, I was walking home from work to quickly change before I met a friend for dinner. On my way home, I lost consciousness + when I came to, I was surrounded by EMTs. I have no memory of losing consciousness at all. I hit my head on the sidewalk during the fall + headed to the ER with a nasty gash on the side of my head to be examined. I was discharged later that night + I ended up with two black eyes + a not-so-subtle bump on my forehead. My mom was able to fly out to DC to spend the next week with me + help me recuperate from my fall.
Nothing came back odd with the ER tests so it was chalked up to dehydration, maybe a drop in blood sugar or blood pressure. It was really scary but with each passing day, it was easier to view that episode as a weird blip that would never happen again.
Then, a couple of weeks ago, I was at work and sitting at my desk about to send an email around. It had been a normal day + normal week as my co-workers + I worked to tie up loose ends before the holidays. Once again, I have no memory of the following events. Apparently, I said “I don’t feel so good” + then immediately slumped over in my chair. EMTs arrived quickly + were there when I regained consciousness. As they explained what had just happened, my first (+ main) thought was, “This again?!” Back to the ER I went for more tests, monitoring of my vitals, + trying to figure out what the heck was going on with me.
I stayed overnight at the ER this time for more observation. At one point, I was covered in electrodes to monitor my brain’s activity. My blood pressure was extremely high, which was obviously cause for concern. I spoke with a couple of neurologists + the following evening, I was released with orders to call at my earliest convenience to set up additional tests to find answers.
I am extremely lucky to have wonderful co-workers who sprung into action immediately + friends who kept my phone buzzing with offers to help however they could. It warmed my heart + brought me to tears (in the happiest way).
2022 will be kicking off with more doctors’ appointments + tests but the big, scary stuff like tumors, clots, + cancer have been ruled out. I am keeping my optimism high that this can be figured out + resolved. I won’t lie – it’s been a scary + unsettling time for me + has led to a couple panic attacks in the following weeks. Going from a healthy, active person to someone surrounded by a giant medical question mark will do that to you.
In my heart of hearts, I feel like my two episodes have to do with stress + are the snowballing results of me not managing my stress as well as I think I do. 2021 was a difficult year for me personally + 2022 will be bringing a lot of personal (+ BIG) changes. To name a few, my job will be ending in almost exactly a year so for the first time in nearly 5 years, I’ll be looking for a new job AND for the first time in a decade, I’ll be looking to break into a new industry.
But on a VERY happy note, I’ll also be getting married in 2022!! James + I will be walking down the aisle this coming summer. And, fingers crossed, James will be stationed in the DC area starting in the spring! We’ve been long distance (of varying lengths) since we first started dating so, needless to say, it’s very exciting that we are (fingers crossed) in the home stretch of long distance.
I took time off after my most recent episode to focus on de-stressing + centering myself. My day job can be quite intense so being able to step away has been incredibly helpful. I’ve been keeping a daily journal of how I’m feeling, what I’m doing, + how that makes me feel. I.e., does it make me feel calm + does it spark joy?
In 2022 (+ beyond), I’m putting a premium on my mental health. I’ve actually already started by adding meditation + yoga, even simple stretching, to my daily routine. In the last couple of weeks, I’ve worked to figure out which habits serve me best + ensure I make the time to show up for myself every day.
Besides meditation + yoga, another act that has given me a needed boost is writing here. I have to be really serious at my 9-6 job so for many years, this blog has been a creative outlet to show my lighter side. I’ve had to step away on-and-off as I went through periods of feeling mentally drained. But I’m excited to get back into using my free time to share more posts with you in 2022!
If you’re still here reading this, thank you so much! I’m ready to make 2022 a year of joy and peace.
